God is always there

I just finished re-reading the story of the resurrection of Lazarus.  He was one of Jesus' best friends.  When he got sick, his family sent a message to Jesus, in hopes that He would come and heal his friend, as he had done for so many others.  Jesus did not come.  In fact, he stayed away on purpose, until his friend had been dead for days.  Then he showed up.  Lazarus' sisters could not understand why He had waited so long.  I am sure that they wondered if He really was the friend that they thought He was.  After all, he healed total strangers.  Why wouldn't He heal his closest friend?  They couldn't make sense of it.

I have read this story so many times.  I always understood it from the perspective that Jesus knew what was going to happen, and He used the events as an object lesson to show everyone that He had power even over death.  He had raised the dead before, but always so soon after that people gave accusation that the deceased weren't truly dead.  This time, there could be no doubt.  And because of this miracle, many people believed.

Now, however, I read this story with a new thought.  I pondered the perceptions of Lazarus' family.  How I relate to them!  So often, I expect God to answer the longings in my heart and the questions in my mind, and I don't get the answer I expect.  Mary and Martha expected that Jesus would come immediately and heal their brother.  The idea that Lazarus would have to die before Jesus would restore him could never have entered their mind.  Jesus still came through for them.  He was always there.  He knew what would happen, and he had a plan all along.  For me, that means a lot.  When I see things happen in my life that I can't explain, and I cannot see God's plan, and I don't hear his guidance, and I can't see his leading, I may be quick to assume that He isn't there or that He is not going to help.  But this story gives me the assurance that even though my circumstances look like they are getting worse, when the dark cloud in my soul seems to close in like death, that God is still there, and that He is planning what is good and right, even though I cannot see beyond the cloud.

Reflection

With this week being Easter, I have been giving a lot of time and thought to the sacrifice that Jesus made for me. As I read the scriptures concentrating especially on the events of the last week of His life, I cannot help but get a sense of how far I am from knowing what is really going on in my life.

Did Jesus die so that I could spend my time worrying about where my next mortgage payment will come from, or arguing with my family or coworkers over what are truly insignificant issues? "Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known." 1 Cor 13:12, NIV.

As I reflect on the Lord's sacrifice, I wonder what it will be like, when we are all in heaven with Him, and He explains all that we cannot at this time see. How will I feel when I see what life was really all about. What opportunities am I missing, as I live my day-to-day life, running around, trying to meet deadlines, focusing on temporal things? Why do I worry about anything at all, when all of the resources of the universe are at my disposal, if I am living out the purposes God has set before me?

A lot to thing about....

Perfection

Well, last week, my husband and I went in to refinance our car.  As the banker was updating our information in his system, he added dependents' ages under my husband's account.  My husband looked it over and asked, "what is this 40 here?"  The banker replied, "Well I didn't know your wife's age, so I just estimated.  It really doesn't make any difference anyway."  Oh, yeah???  It made a difference to me...I'm 37!

Today, one of my coworkers saw me walking down the hall.  I had removed my lab jacket, so I was wearing just my top and pants.  She came up to me and said, "Wow.  It looks like you've missed a few runs on the treadmill, haven't you?"  I couldn't believe it!  Over the previous 2 years, I have lost 50 #.  I have gained back 8 in the last 3 months, but I still weigh 126, so it isn't like I'm obese.

In just a few days, I have gone from being young, vibrant and attractive, to being old and fat!!!

Good thing "man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart" (sorry, I don't remember the reference for the verse).  I guess I will be working a lot more on the heart part, since the body isn't so hot.  (and I should probably invest in some wrinkle cream!)  I am so glad that my self-esteem isn't wrapped up in what people think of me.  Just wait until we all get to heaven and have glorious new bodies, like HIS body.  Then we will really see how far short even the best of us are!

prayer

I have been spending a lot more time in prayer and Bible study since our pastor's challenge, but I have to admit, it has not been easy.  As I have been praying, I have been overwhelmed with questions about how/why prayer works.  I understand that God wants us to communicate with him.  How else can a relationship grow?  I also understand that God is great enough and powerful enough to meet all of our needs and heal our infirmities, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual.  And I understand that God has a plan for each of us, and that if we follow it, we will surely be blessed.  I ask often for understanding and guidance, that I will be able to discern the plans that He has for me.  But I really struggle when it comes for asking him for specific things, such as healing someone's illness, as I know that God is really the only one that knows what the outcome will and should be.  I wondered, "Does it really make any difference if I pray for someone?  What if God has a plan for that person, and I am asking for something that is not his will?  What if what I am asking for is already his will, and he is already doing it?"  I guess this is my own feelings of inadequacy showing through, as I feel unworthy to ask him to do something that only he can do anyway.

In any case, I was praying specifically about this on Tuesday.  I asked God to help me understand more about prayer, as I obviously don't fully grasp what it is all about.  That's when I met Connie. 

I had been praying for her for months.  She had been in a serious accident several months ago and needed healing.  When I met her, for the first time, I could see for myself that she was strong and vibrant and had been blessed by God.  She had an exuberance about her and was quick to tell me what a miracle had been performed in her life.  God had healed her in a way that only He could.  She was emphatic that it was only through the prayers of others that she was well.  I was so inspired, not only in her healing, but in God's response to my own prayer.

I still don't understand how it makes a difference for one person to pray for another, or why God listens to any of us in the first place, but I am more sure than ever that it is a vital part of our relationship with him and with each other.  I may never find out all the "how's and why's," but I will continue to make prayer an important part of my spiritual life, knowing one day, He will show me the answers to all of my questions.

This week, our pastor challenged us to spend an hour a day in prayer and study of God's word.  I must admit, I probably only spend about an hour a week studying the scriptures, and I am one of those pray-on-the-fly kind of people, so I have no idea how much time I spend in prayer.  I eagerly accepted the challenge, in front of my peers, my pastor, and...my enemy, the devil.

I don't know why I had to start this adventure on the same weekend as daylight savings time.  And, as with all of the other times that I have endeavored to improve my connection with God, I have found this to be a difficult challenge.  The first day went fine.  But by the second day, Satan had devised plenty of schemes to keep me from my plan.  I was too tired in the morning, so I only got in 12 minutes of Bible study, as I hurried to get myself and my family ready for work and school.  I figured I could get the rest in on my lunch break and after work.  Then, work was so busy that I didn't get a break.  (another lost opportunity).  I worked late, and had to go shopping.  I got home just in time to begin making dinner.  Then, before I knew it, it was bedtime.  I managed to squeek in a little time as dinner was cooking, but I didn't make the hour goal that had been set.

At this point, as with any goal, I have two options:  to keep trying, or to give up.  Satan has had my entire lifetime to study me, and he knows exactly what it takes to make me fail, and he has vested interest in making me fail at spiritual growth above all else.  He can either make the situation seem hopeless, so that I can quit, or he can make me focus so hard on meeting the time goal, that I lose focus on the real issue, spending time in the word and building a stronger relationship with God. 

So, I have set out to continue to meet the goal of one hour a day.  But, I will not lose site of the most important fact:  God is more interested in the quality of the time I spend with him than the quantity.  He will bless every effort that I make, and then some.  So, I am thankful for the time that I did spend, the lessons that I did learn, and the opportunity to meet with Him again, day after day, moment by moment, from now into eternity.  And I will make every moment count!

What is man?

I belong to a small group that meets weekly to fellowship and read the Bible and other Christian literature, and to discuss its application to our daily lives.  Last evening, we were discussing the life of a Bible character, a man named Job.

 

Job, through no fault of his own, suffered the tremendous loss of his wealth, his family, and even his physical health in a matter of days.  Satan had accused God of favoring Job, and surmised that Job would not worship God if God would withdraw his blessings on Job and his family.  God allowed Satan to take everything away from Job, except for his life, in order to prove that Job would remain faithful.

 

In the end, Job came out on top and was blessed even more than before, as he did remain faithful to God.  But this story raises a few questions:   Is God just sitting up there, playing games with us?  Why are we even here?  What does God think of us?

 

One of our group members suggested that we are to God as an ant is to us.  We are so lowly and so far separated from the majesty and intellect of God that we can never know his thoughts or plans.  I agree with this, to a point.  God is the creator of everything in the universe.  His power is unsurpassed.  He spends his days in glory beyond our imagination.  His throne is surrounded by angels, and Cherubim, and Seraphim, and creatures so magical that the prophets couldn’t even describe them.  So what could we possibly add to the equation?

 

I wish I could say that I have answers to these questions.  Maybe, someday, I can discuss them with God, face to face, and know the answers.  But what I do know is this:  God gave everything he had, in the life of his very own Son, Jesus, the only Son he ever had or will have.  Jesus endured a suffering we will never know, even to the point of death on the cross.  He did this for the human race.  Not for angels, not for any other creature.  He did it for you and for me.  That makes us more valuable that anything in all creation.  And if He values us this much, I can be sure that he is not just playing games.  This is for real.  Whatever his purpose for your life or for mine, we can be sure that it is significant.

Acceptance

This week, a student nurse came to me with a problem.  The patient he had been assigned to had opened up to him and shared that she was depressed about being at the end of her life and that she wished she would just die.  The student was beside himself.  How was he supposed to respond to something like that?  I asked him, "What did you do?"  He said, "I just sat there.  I didn't know what to say."

I explained to him that, in spite of our natural tendency, as nurses, to want to heal people and to "fix" things, the best way to respond to a situation like this is to simply listen.  We cannot solve problems like aging and death.  People have a right to be depressed, or angry, or whatever else they may be feeling.  Our job is to encourage the patient to trust us with their thoughts and feelings, and to accept them as they are.  We help by validating their feelings, and therefore, validating them as a person.

This made me think about how we treat others as Christians.  We want to bring people to Christ.  We want to let everyone know that Jesus loves them.  But so often, especially corporately, as "the church" we fail to accept people as they are, to validate them.  When we should be telling them, "Jesus loves you.  He created you, and you are special, just the way He made you," we send the message that "Jesus will love you once you become one of us."  We expect them to change who they are, when it is really Jesus that changes people.  It is not our job.  We are to listen, to share, to encourage people to trust us with their thoughts and their feelings and to validate each and every person as a true son of God, equal in standing to every other son of God.

Imagine what an impact we would make, as Christians, if we were all loving, accepting, comforting, and encouraging toward everyone.  If God is love, then we should, as the body of Christ, be love, too.  Leave the "fixing" to Him, and just accept our neighbors and friends, and our enemies, too, as children of the King of the universe.

Representing God

Philip Yancey, in his book, “Disappointment with God” tells how we, as a bunch of “…lamebranes and misfits and nitpickers and holier-than-thous and stuffed shirts and odd ducks and egomaniacs and milquetoasts and closet sensualists” are the ones that God has chosen to represent his character here on earth.  “Three temples appear in the Bible, and taken together, they illustrate a progression:  God revealed himself first as Father, then as Son, and finally as Holy Spirit.  The first temple was a magnificent structure built by Solomon and rebuilt by Herod.  The second was the ‘temple’ of Jesus’ body…(the) third temple has taken shape, fashioned out of individual human beings.”

 

“If you want to see God, then look at the people who belong to him—they are his ‘bodies.’  They are the body of Christ.”  We may be the only Bible or church that our neighbor may ever know.  What a humbling thought that at any given time, God may be putting us in a position to reach others with his message of love, in a way that no one else can.  Everyone is seeking love and acceptance.  How will they ever find it if you, if I, never reach out to each other, in love, and live out the character of God?  What if we realize that every opportunity that we miss in saying a kind word, or giving acceptance and love to someone in need, might be the only opportunity that person ever has of understanding God’s love for him or her?

 

I want to be ready at any moment to be God’s ambassador, to represent his character of grace, compassion, and love.  Unfortunately, I am so imperfect and unprepared for such a task.  It is my prayer that God willwork in me day by day, so that I will recognize these opportunities and will beworthy of such a mighty work.

Unfair

The wealthy grow fat from the gain of their greed,

While others are hungry and in desperate need.

Criminals get away with their evil deeds,

Unconcerned as they are with their victims' needs.

An innocent child suffers a deadly disease,

While her mother begs for a cure, on her knees.

A tornado rips through the middle of town,

And some homes are spared, others torn down.

A promotion is given to the brown-nosing clown,

While the loyal, hard-worker's raise is turned down.

Parents work hard, to give their kids the best chance,

But the children just scoff and turn away without a glance.

Corporations pump toxins into the water and the air.

The effects on our planet?  They do not seem to care.

Some persecute their brothers, based on color, sex, or creed,

With a "moral obligation" to perform some evil deed.

With chaos all around us, so much appears unfair;

It makes me often wonder:  does God know or even care?

But He sees what's all around us; our troubles are His, too.

He took a risk before hand, when He created me and you.

With a choice to love and follow Him, or to throw it all away,

We brought sin and death into the world, a penalty to pay.

God knew we could not pay the price;

It called for too great a sacrifice.

With a love we cannot comprehend,

God's plan:  his only son He'd send.

To give up heaven's splendor, take on all our shame,

Be tempted in all ways, and, though faultless, bear our blame.

His holy blood to cover sins that were not His,

Who could imagine such a love as this?

Justice would mean giving us what we deserve,

But mercy is His gift, and He came only to serve.

Since we don't want what's fair in our own circumstance,

Let's follow God's lead and give grace a chance.

 

Following the rules

I am having trouble with my teenage daughter right now.  She has been ditching school to hang out with her friends.  When I ask her what she has been doing, or who she has been hanging out with, she tells me that it is none of my business.  When I tell her that she has to go to school, or anything else for that matter, she tells me that she doesn't have to do what I tell her, and I can't make her.  This really frustrates me, especially since she is right.  While I do have a few tricks up my sleve, and I can encourage her to make the right decisions, I cannot make her do anything.

This made me think about how God must often feel when we make the wrong choices.  He has given us direction, commandments, and other "rules" to help guide us, so that we can have the best life possible.  But we don't always choose well.  Often, we decide to go our own way, do our own thing, and, like my daughter, tell God "I am going to do it my own way, and you can't stop me."  And, like earthly parents, God doesn't force us.  He allows us to make our own decisions and reap the benefits and suffer the consequences of the decisions we make.  But, like earthly parents, God is affected by the decisions we make.  He weeps when we head down the wrong path, as I weep when my child chooses to disobey.  He knows the outcome of our ill-conceived plans, and He wishes for us to turn away from those things that will lead us away from Him.  

All of this has made me even more aware of what a great and loving God I have, and I am so thankful for His patience and understanding.  And this will give me the strength to be patient with my child and prayerfully allow her to find her true path, even when it means suffering the consequences of her poor decisions. 

more blessings

I came across this in an article I was reading, and it really touched me.  It is the Benediction inscribed at Gloucester Cathedral, in England:

"Go on your way in peace,

Be of good courage.

Hold fast that which is good.

Render to no man evil for evil.

Strengthen the fainthearted.

Support the weak.

Help and cheer the sick.

Honor all men.

Love and serve the Lord.

May the blessing of God be upon you

And remain with you forever.

So be it.  And have a blessed good night!"

 

Wouldn't this make a great prayer every morning before starting the day?

Times of Grief

            I lost a patient last week.  Her room was right next to my office, and she would frequently call out my name, asking for help.  She had heart and respiratory problems and was always very anxious and needed a lot of reassurance just to get through the day.  Eventually, she became weaker and weaker, and finally she succumbed to her illness.

     In my line of work, I suppose I should get used to people coming to the end of their lives and passing away.  But, as much as I am intellectually prepared for this, each time it happens, I feel like something is wrong.  I can’t shake the idea that it isn’t supposed to be like this.  How can something so natural feel so foreign?

            This idea has hit me many times, until I finally came to the conclusion that it feels so foreign because it really wasn’t meant to be like this at all.  God originally designed this world, and each of us, for eternity.  He set the tree of life in the Garden of Eden, and this same tree is mentioned in Revelation to be in the earth made new.  God’s promise of eternal life would be meaningless if He couldn’t really provide it, and if we didn’t so desperately desire it.

            I praise God that even through times of tragedy, He gives us the assurance that He is with us in all our trouble, and that He has something so much more incredible awaiting us.

Blessed are....

 

As with most people, I have a tendency to try to make my world fit neatly into little boxes, or categories, which help me make sense of things. This is true with my understanding of spiritual concepts as well.  Case in point:  I have always read the section in Matthew, known as the Beatitudes, as a list of different categories of people who would receive special blessings from God.  I have always wondered which of these fit me, and which of God’s blessings he is reserving for me.  Then one day, I had an amazing thought:  these are not a list of types of personalities; they are traits that we should all strive to develop within ourselves, or better yet, to allow God to develop within us. And the blessings belong to all who seek to follow God with all their heart, mind, soul, and strength.

 

Here is my rendition of the beatitudes: When we are poor in spirit, recognizing our need for God’s love and cleansing, He reminds us that we are being prepared for life in heaven.  When we are sad and mourning over our losses, He wants us to know that He is our comfort.  When we are feeling unworthy, or meek, He wants us to remember that we do not belong to this world, we are His children, the heirs of everything that he owns, and we have a great inheritance awaiting us.  When we seek Him out and hunger for Godliness in our lives, He guarantees that we will find Him and He will meet our deepest needs.  He will never leave us nor forsake us.

 

When we are forgiving and merciful toward others, regardless of the cost to ourselves, we are guaranteed that God is more than willing to return the same mercy toward us, and even more so.  When we act out of a pure conscience and stand up for the truth, keeping our integrity, and having only right motives for our actions, God will not be ashamed of us, and we will get our reward in actually seeing him, face to face, throughout eternity. When we act toward peace with our families, our coworkers, our neighbors, and even other countries and cultures, We are blessed by being God’s ambassadors, acting as His children would, as we are made like Him.  When everything goes wrong around us, and we are treated unfairly and persecuted for our belief and our actions in following God, He blesses us in the knowledge that we are not citizens of this world, but His countrymen, citizens of Heaven, where things will finally be put right and we shall see glory beyond belief.  Our reward will be more than our wildest dreams can imagine. 

 

So, I see now that God is not stingy with his blessings, saving certain ones for his favorite people and giving the rest of us what is left over.  I am so thankful that God is working in each of us, day by day, one step at a time, and instead of seeking to punish our every misstep, He is cheering us on and showering us with every good blessing.  God is always giving, so that we will have everything we need to be victorious.

 

“And I pray that Christ will be more and more at home in your hearts as you trust in him.  May your roots go down deep into the soil of God’s marvelous love.  And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love really is.  May you experience the love of Christ, though it is so great you will never fully understand it.  Then you will be filled with the fullness of life and power that comes from God.”  Ephesians 3: 17 – 19, NewLiving Translation.

Blessings

Daily blessings

 

            I have a patient who suffers from dementia.  She has days when she is barely responsive, and others when she is alert and conversant.  Her husband, a very devoted man, comes into the facility every day before breakfast, to sit with his wife and to make sure she gets the best possible start to each day.  He then helps her with her meals and stays with her all day, pushing her around the facility in her wheelchair, talking with her, pointing out the events that are happening around her, and helping her in every way that he can.  He then goes home to rest a bit before starting the whole routine over again the next day.  Oh, how he longs to have her whole again, to take her back home, and to share his love with her the way he used to.  But life has dealt them a difficult hand.  He waits desperately for a miracle.

            Now, when this dear lady first came to us, she was completely closed-in. She did not talk or interact with her environment.  She required total care in all areas.  She often didn’t even seem to be aware of her surroundings.  But, after a few medication changes, nutritional support, and, I believe, much prayer on the part of her husband and the staff at our facility, she has slowly begun to awaken.  She is now talking more, attempting at times to hold a cup or a spoon, and even to stand and take some steps with help. 

            We first noticed the change beginning to take place when some visitors brought in a Chihuahua to show the patients.  Pets do wonders in a nursing home.  They seem to bring out joy in even the grumpiest old codger.  I love to see the older folks interact with their soft, fluffy companions.  Often, after interacting with the animal, they will share stories of their own pets, and it will always bring a smile to their faces. 

            Well, as the visitors placed this tiny dog in the lady’s lap, she smiled and began to speak.  She said that she liked the dog.  It was the first time in a very long time that she had spoken a full sentence.  Her husband was amazed, and took this as a sign that his wife would be healed.  He told her, “If you get well, Honey, I will buy you a dog.”

            This just about broke my heart. I truly believe that God was listening to his prayers and was giving him and his wife nothing short of a miracle, in her ability to recognize and interact with her husband and her environment.  She wasn’t able to do that before.  But she was not completely restored to full health, so he could not see the miracle before him.  He wanted more.

            Isn’t that how we all tend to be?  We ask God for His blessings, and when He gives us what we need, in a package that appears different from what we expect, we are disappointed.  We want God’s blessings in the manner that we desire them, not waiting for Him to work out His will in His way.  Wouldn’t it be great if we could leave our problems in His capable hands and simply thank Him for the blessings He gives, however they come? 

            Take some time this week to note the generous blessings that God has showered down on you.  And then thank him.